One of the most valuable lessons I've learned recently is to detach. The hard part about this is it may appear to others that I don't care. The opposite is what brought me to my lowest point. I cared too much. Sometimes I still do. I was codependent. Still am, and probably always will be to the core. I cared more for others than I did myself. Realizing that I need to care for myself first was a foreign concept and is still quite uncomfortable.
There is a sense of peace, serenity, when you learn to detach. You will always be surrounded by some form of chaos, whether it's with your family, partners, friends, or colleagues. Removing your involvement from the chaos is difficult, but rewarding. Not only does it free up time for you to spend doing things you truly love, but it enables you to help others in the long run.
What works for me when I see drama unfolding?
- Be quiet.
- Listen.
- Observe.
- Ask yourself "was I requested to do something or respond?" If yes, only partake if you have something valuable to contribute, and truly feel you can help. If no action was requested on your part, shut your mouth. Seriously.
- Pray and/or meditate. Ask your higher power for guidance.
- Let go and get back to focusing on you.
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If you're really confused, when all else fails, refer to Miguel Ruiz's The Four Agreements. These have literally saved my sanity the past few months. I used to over analyze and worry. Now...I can take a more healthy approach. 1. Be Impeccable with Your Word 2. Don't take anything personally 3. Don't make assumptions 4. Always Do Your Best
